How to overcome habit of masturbation?

1) The motive to seek a cure for this problem should be solely following Allah's orders and fearing His punishment.

2) A permanent and quick cure from this problem lies in marriage as soon as the person is able, as shown in the Prophet's (peace and blessings be upon him) hadeeth.

3) Keeping oneself busy with what is good for this world and the Hereafter is essential in breaking this habit before it becomes second nature after which it is very difficult to rid oneself of it.

4) Lowering the gaze (from looking at forbidden things such as pictures, movies etc.) will help suppress the desire before it leads one to commit the haram (forbidden). Allah orders men and women to lower their gaze as shown in the following two verses and in the Prophet's hadeeth.

{Tell the believing men to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things) and protect their private parts (from illegal sexual acts, etc.). That is purer for them. Verily, Allah is all-aware of what they do. And tell the believing women to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things) and protect their private parts (from illegal sexual acts, etc.) ..... } (24: 30-31)

Allah's Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him) said: "Do not follow a casual (unintentional) look (at forbidden things) with another look." Al-Tirmidhi, 2777. This is a general instruction by the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) to abstain from all that may sexually excite a person because it might lead him/her to commit the haram (forbidden).

5) Using one's available leisure time in worshipping Allah and increasing religious knowledge.

6) Being cautious not to develop any of the medical symptoms that may result from masturbation such as weak eyesight, weak nervous system, and/or back pain. More importantly, feeling of guilt and anxiety that can be complicated by missing obligatory prayers because of the need to shower (ghusl) after every incidence of masturbation, especially in the winter, and the invalidating of the fast.

7) Avoiding the illusion that some youth have that masturbation is permissible because it prevents them from committing illegal sexual acts such as fornication or even homosexuality, while they may not be at the gates of that immorality to begin with.

8) Strengthening one's willpower and not surrendering to the shaytan, and avoiding spending time alone as recommended by the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) when he said "Do not spend the night alone" Ahmad, 6919.

9) Following the Prophet's (peace and blessings be upon him) aforementioned hadeeth and fasting when possible, because fasting will temper one's sexual desire and keep it under control. However, one should not overreact and swear by Allah not to return to the act because if one does not honor one's promise, one would be facing the consequences of not living up to one's oath to Allah. Also, note that medication to diminish one's sexual desire is strictly prohibited because it might permanently affect one's sexual ability.

10) Trying to follow the Prophet's (peace and blessings be upon him) recommendation concerning the etiquette of getting ready for bed, such as reading the well-known supplications, sleeping on the right side, and avoiding sleeping on the belly (the Prophet-peace and blessings be upon him- forbade sleeping on the belly).

11) Striving hard to be patient and chaste, because persistence will eventually, Allah willing, lead to attaining those qualities as second nature, as the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) explains in the following hadeeth:

"Whoever seeks chastity Allah will make him chaste, and whoever seeks help from none but Allah, He will help him, and whoever is patient He will make it easy for him, and no one has ever been given anything better than patience." Al-Bukhari:1469.

12) If one falls into this sin, they must hasten to repenting, asking forgiveness from Allah, doing good deeds, and not losing hope and feeling despair; these are all prerequisites to curing this problem. Note that losing hope is one of the major sins punishable by Allah.

13) Finally, Allah is the Most Merciful and He always responds to whoever calls on Him. So, asking for Allah's forgiveness and help will be accepted, by His will.

Ref: Islamqa.en/info

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What should be the first thing taught to the child?

  *Teaching the CHILD: Kalimatut-Tawheed*

*(LAA ILAAHA ILLALLAH* *– There is none deserving of Worship in truth except ALLAAH)*

So the first of what the child begins with in speech, obligatory upon al-waalidayn (the father and mother), is teaching him Kalimatut-Tawheed (LAA ILAAHA ILLALLAH), and to instruct to it.

Ibn Abbaas (radhi allahu anhum) narrates that An-Nabiyy (the Prophet) (sallallahu alaihi wasallam) said:

*"Establish upon your children the first statement, LAA ILAAHA ILLALLAH and instruct them at the time of death LAA ILAAHA ILLALLAH*".

Umm Sulaym (radhi allahu anha), used to teach her son Anas (radhi allahu anhu) to say:

*LAA ILAAHA ILLALLAH (There is none deserving of Worship in truth except ALLAAH). Say: I bear witness that Muhammad is the Messenger of ALLAAH, and that was before Al-Fitaam (the end of 2 year suckling or nursing period of a baby from his mother).*

It must be repeated in front of him, and this is pertaining to the mother and she plays with him. It then becomes habitual. To bring about understanding, she explains to him a simple explanation teaching him its meaning.

*He knows that ALLAAH is One, and HE has no partner(s).*

*HE (ALLAAH) is Al-Khaaliq (The Creator)*.

*HE (ALLAAH) is Above the heavens, and HE Rises Above HIS Arsh (Throne*).

*HE (ALLAAH) is Fully aware (in sight and knowledge) over us and Knowledgeable of our affairs.*

*HE (ALLAAH) Hears and Sees. Verily HE is Al-Qaadir (HIS Will and Decree is over everything)*.

*Trusting upon ALLAAH becomes habitual and ALLAAH is Ash-Shaafee (the ONE Who Cures and Gives good health).*

*It is OBLIGATORY upon us to love HIM (ALLAAH) and to worship HIM.*

Likewise, the child is to be taught to love An-Nabiyy (sallallahu alaihi wasallam), and to obey him. That he (sallallahu alaihi wasallam) loved children and played with them and similar to that of what she (the mother) teaches him (the child) of their understanding.

It is repeated upon them (children):

*Who is your LORD?*

*Who is your Prophet?*

*What is your Religion?*

 and

*Where is ALLAAH?.*

He (the child) learns about love of the Sahabas (radhi allahu almajmaeen) and the righteous (rahimamullah).

He (the child) MEMORISES:

Al-Faatihah,

Suratul-Ikhlaas and

Al-Mu’awwidhatayn ( Suratul-Falaq and Suratun-Naas).

Source: “Taribeeyatul-Awlaad fee Dhaw’il-Kitaab was Sunnah” [Educating the Children in the Light of the Book (Qur’aan) and the Sunnah], introduced by Saalih inb Fawzaan Al-Fawzaan (hafidhahullah)

Tags: First important and basic concept and teaching for children; Islamic parenting; How to raise children; Effective and good Upbringing of children; What your child and infant should know; Knowing Allah; Syllabus for infants and children; What children and infants should learn?; Children should learn and understand Kalimatut-tawheed, Allah's names and attributes; They should know name of prophet and religion; They should know stories of companions; Children should learn surahs of Quran; What should be the first thing child learn, know and taught?