Treatment of introvert behaviour, avoiding social gatherings, not mixing with people and staying alone at home

Praise be to Allaah.

Firstly: 

The situation you are in does not only have to do with praying in the mosque, rather it has to do with other duties which require you to go out of the house, such as upholding ties of kinship, earning money so that you can live, seeking knowledge, enjoining what is good, forbidding what is evil, and so on. 

Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah (may Allah have mercy on him) said: 

The fact of the matter is that mixing may sometimes be obligatory or mustahabb. An individual may be enjoined to mix with others sometimes and to remain alone sometimes. That depends on the purpose. If mixing with others is for the purpose of cooperating in righteousness and piety, then it is enjoined; but if it is for the purpose of cooperating in sin and transgression, then it is forbidden. Mixing with Muslims is a kind of worship, as in the case of the five daily prayers, Jumu’ah, Eid, eclipse prayers, prayers for rain and so on. This is something that Allah and His Messenger (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) have enjoined. The same applies to mixing with them on Hajj and when fighting the kuffaar and rebels, even if the leaders of that are evildoers and even if there are some evildoers among the people involved. 

The same applies to being involved in gatherings that increase a person's faith, either because he benefits from these gatherings or he can benefit others, and so on. 

Majmoo’ al-Fataawa, 10/425 

Thus you can see that the way you are is something that is not pleasing to the Lord of the Worlds, and you have to look again at the situation and realise that what you are doing is a trick from the shaytaan who is making your situation and your bad deed look good to you. Beware of him and his tricks, and get ready to fight him, and trust that your Lord will help you by granting victory against him. 

Secondly: 

If you feel distress when mixing with people, then we can be certain that you will never be better off on your own or in isolation. Rather the wolf eats the sheep that wanders off from the flock and the shaytaan overpowers those who are solitary and do not have helpers to help them obey their Lord or supporters who will support them against the shaytaan and his troops. Even if you find some annoyance in mixing with people, that mixing, if you bear it with patience, is still better than not mixing. The Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) praised the one who mixes with people and bears their annoyance with patience. 

It was narrated that Ibn ‘Umar said: The Messenger of Allaah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “The believer who mixes with people and bears their annoyance with patience will have a greater reward than the one who does not mix with people and does not put up with their annoyance.” Narrated by al-Tirmidhi (5207) and Ibn Maajah (4032). 

Moreover, there is no reason for your isolation and you do not have -- as far as we can see -- any justification for which we would encourage you to remain like that. We feel that any isolation which results in you not praying jumu’ah for prayers in congregation is not acceptable and we do not encourage it. 

Some of the reasons for isolation include total corruption of people, lack of people to support you in adhering to the truth, each person admiring his own opinion, and lack of benefit in sincerely advising people. By Allah's grace, none of these are applicable in Muslim societies or even in kaafir societies. We have heard of thousands of kuffaar who are entering the religion of Allah all the time, and we hear of others like them, sinners who have begun to follow the path of guidance. Indeed we find that people are thirsting for those who will quench their thirst and they are hungry for those who will feed them, in spiritual terms of goodness and guidance. 

As for your justification for isolation, namely shar’i knowledge, we do not think this is the case. You are preferring isolation to the kind of mixing that is obligatory, so if you are neglecting Islamic duties because of this isolation of yours, what kind of sha’i knowledge do you have so that we could tell you to keep away from people and focus on obeying your Lord and preserving your religious commitment? Hence Abu Sulaymaan al-Khattaabi (may Allah have mercy on him) said: Isolation only benefits scholars and wise men, but it is the most harmful of things for the ignorant. And he narrated from Ibraaheem that he said to Mugheerah: Acquire deep understanding of Islam, then you can isolate yourself. 

See: al-‘Azlah by al-Khattaabi, p. 225 

Thirdly: 

As you have written to us -- and we appreciate that -- this means that you are still holding on to a thread and the beginning of the right way to bring you out of this fatal loneliness. You have entered the world of the Internet, which is millions of times greater than your small world that you have forsaken. In this vast world there is far more evil than in your forsaken world. So beware of that, for how much temptation it has caused to righteous people and how much evil it has caused to righteous and chaste women. 

Strive to do the acts of worship which Allah has enjoined on you, first and foremost among which is praying in congregation in the mosque. In the answer to question number 120 you will find the evidence for this duty. You also have to earn permissible income so as to protect your dignity and spare you from having to ask of people, and so that you can honour your parents and take care of them and help them to buy what they need or help them to get to the places they want to go, and uphold ties of kinship with your family and relatives. 

You should remember that this world will never be free of hardships, worries and distress. If you want a place where there is none of these things, with complete happiness and ease, a good life and the pleasure of Allah, then you will find that in the Paradise of Allah in the Hereafter. So strive for that Day and rid yourself of that which may cause you distress in this world by reducing your involvement in it; ask Allah to help you to attain that, and remember that isolating oneself is nothing more than being alone with the Shaytaan, and it will only bring you more worries and distress. Do you not see that the punishment of imprisonment is painful for the free man, and the worst form of it is solitary confinement? So how can you prefer for yourself that which prisoners would sacrifice that which is most dear to them in order to escape?  

We ask Allah to guide you to the truth and to help you to follow the path of the righteous among His slaves; were it not for the fact that Allah decreed that they should mix with people and establish acts of worship, we and you would not have known Islam or had the honour of belonging to it. So become one of the troops of Islam, wield your weapon in the face of your shaytaan and make up for what you have missed by striving hard and doing acts of worship on a solid basis. 

And Allah is the source of strength.

Seeking Divorce due to Depression

Praise be to Allaah.

Firstly: 

The depression that people feel may be a sickness that needs to be treated and needs referral to specialists; or it may be feelings of distress that may be relieved by doing a lot of acts of worship, remembering Allah, keeping company with good and righteous friends, and keeping busy with beneficial actions. For more information on that please see the answer to questions number 22704, 21515 and100774. 

Whatever the case, Allah has not sent down any disease but He has sent down a cure for it, and there is a remedy for this depression no matter what type it is. The believer should adorn himself with patience and certainty of faith, and he should turn to Allah a great deal and ask of Him, because the keys to goodness are in His hand. How many believing men and women have patiently borne a sickness or calamity or imprisonment, without feeling the need to commit a haraam action. This is the action of people who are discontent with the divine decree and are not patient in accepting what Allah wills; they hasten to rid themselves of what has befallen them by any means, no matter what negative consequences it leads to in this world or the Hereafter.  

Secondly: 

It is not permissible for a woman to ask her husband for divorce except for a legitimate shar’i reason which prevents her from continuing with him, such as his bad treatment or her being put off by him to the extent that she cannot give him his rights. That is because of the reports narrated by Abu Dawood (2226), al-Tirmidhi (1187) and Ibn Maajah (2055) from Thawbaan (may Allah be pleased with him) who said: The Messenger of Allaah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “Any woman who asks her husband for a divorce when it is not absolutely necessary, the fragrance of Paradise will be forbidden to her.”

Classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh Abi Dawood. 

And it was narrated from ‘Uqbah ibn ‘Aamir (may Allah be pleased with him) that the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “Those who ask for khula’ are hypocrite women.” Narrated by al-Tabaraani in al-Kabeer (17/339); classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Jaami’. No/ 1934. 

If we assume that the wife in her state of anger, sickness or depression asked her husband for a divorce, when she calms down she will realize her mistake and ask Allah for forgiveness and apologize to her husband.  

If the depression and hardship stem from her relationship with her husband, because of his bad treatment or because she dislikes him, and this is proven by trustworthy people from her family, then they should try to bring about reconciliation and consult the husband with regard to that, so as to reach a solution which will bring the wife out of the state of depression in which she is living. 

Our advice to the questioner -- who has mentioned that the reason for her depression is being far away from her family -- is that she should be patient and try to get over this crisis. 

Depression -- in most cases -- happens to the person who has too much free time, who is not keeping himself busy with useful work, whether it has to do with matters of the Hereafter or with worldly matters. 

Keep yourself busy by doing useful things; join a circle for memorizing the Holy Qur'aan; get to know trustworthy sisters who are religiously committed and of good character, and work with them in doing good deeds. 

You can make an agreement with your husband that you can visit your family from time to time, and we also encourage your family to visit you as well. 

The husband has to put up with what he may encounter from his wife, and try to support her and help her to get over this crisis. It is essential for the husband, the wife and her family to cooperate so that things may go back to normal. 

As for divorce, stop thinking about it and overcome the depression that you are faced with. Seek the help of Allah and call upon Him a great deal. 

We ask Allah to set your affairs straight and to help you to do all that is good. 

And Allah knows best.

Treatment of forgetfulness and weak memory

Praise be to Allaah.  

Perhaps your forgetfulness – or your weak memory – is a result of giving birth, as your doctor said. This is not something to worry about. Or this forgetfulness may be caused by sin, because sins result in punishments that affect the heart and the body. Imaam Ibn al-Qayyim (may Allaah have mercy on him) mentioned more than sixty punishments for sin in his book al-Daa’ wa’l-Dawa’. 

So if a person feels that he is losing some blessing, he should hasten to repent to Allaah. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): 

“That is so because Allaah will never change a grace which He has bestowed on a people until they change what is in their ownselves”

[al-Anfaal 8:53] 

If a person makes a promise then forgets it unintentionally, there is no sin on him, because Allaah has forgiven this ummah for what they forget, as is indicated by the texts. For example, the last two verses of Soorat al-Baqarah (interpretation of the meaning): 

“Our Lord! Punish us not if we forget or fall into error”

[al-Baqarah 2:286] 

And Allaah has said: “I have done that.” (Narrated by Muslim) 

There are also means that will help you to remember appointments, such as using a diary (in book or electronic form) to record appointments by day and date. This is a means which is proven to work. How many people forget their appointments, but they organize them by using these reminders. 

Another means is using an electronic alarm clock or a mobile phone to remind you of the time of an appointment… and other modern means that are available. 

There are also audio reminders on which you can record appointments and it will speak to remind you of the appointment. 

Each person must pay as much attention as possible to this matter, because breaking promises is one of the signs of the hypocrites, as it says in the hadeeth: “There are four characteristics, whoever has them is a pure hypocrite, and whoever has one of them has one of the attributes of hypocrisy until he gives it up: when he speaks, he lies; when he makes a pledge he betrays it; when he makes a promise he breaks it; and when he disputes he resorts to obscene speech.”

 (Narrated by Muslim, 53)

 Keeping appointments is one of the signs of the people of faith.

 Similarly those who miss appointments for a reason such as that mentioned in the question should explain their reasons to the other party involved, so that he will not be offended. We ask Allaah to protect us and you from all kinds of evil. And Allaah is the Source of strength.

Not Comfortable with a particular person

Praise be to Allaah.  

What the Muslim should do is refrain from bearing any hatred or resentment in his heart towards his fellow Muslim. Allaah says of His believing slaves (interpretation of the meaning): 

“And those who came after them say: Our Lord! Forgive us and our brethren who have preceded us in Faith, and put not in our hearts any hatred against those who have believed. Our Lord! You are indeed full of kindness, Most Merciful”

[al-Hashr 59:10] 

According to a hadeeth narrated by Anas ibn Maalik (may Allaah be pleased with him), the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Do not hate one another, do not envy one another, do not turn your backs on one another, and be, O slaves of Allaah, brothers. It is not permissible for a Muslim to forsake his brother for more than three days.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 5718; Muslim, 2559. 

Ibn ‘Abd al-Barr said: His saying “Do not hate one another” is a prohibition which is aimed at encouraging them to discipline themselves to love one another. Al-Istidhkaar, 8/289. 

But a person may feel that he does not like a person enough for him to become a close friend, even though he fulfils his Islamic duty of returning his salaams, saying “Yarhamuk-Allaah (May Allaah have mercy on you)” if he sneezes, helping him if he needs help, and so on. In this case what exists between them does not come under the heading of forsaking or shunning, and it is forgiven in sha Allaah. According to a hadeeth narrated by ‘Aa’ishah (may Allaah be pleased with her), the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Souls are troops collected together and those who got along with one other (in the realm where souls existed before entering physical bodies in this world) will have an affinity with one another (in this world) and those amongst who did not get along with one another  (in the realm where souls existed before entering physical bodies in this world) will also not get along (in this world).” Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 3158; Muslim, 2638. 

Al-Khattaabi said: This may be understood as referring to similarlity between souls which are either good or bad, righteous or immoral, and that good people are attracted to those who are like them and evil people are likewise attracted to those who are like them, so people’s souls recognize one another according to their nature, whether good or evil; if they are similar they will get along and if they are different they will not get along. 

Al-Qurtubi said: Although souls have in common the fact that they are all souls, they differ in other ways. Souls of similar nature will get along because of their nature. Therefore we see people of a certain type get along, but they do not get along with people of a different nature, and we see that with people who are of a similar nature, some of them get along with one another and some do not, and that depends on the issues which form the basis of getting along or otherwise.

Treatment of Hot tempered and Short temper Child

Praise be to Allaah.  

The issue of dealing with anger has already been discussed. Please see question no. 658. Means of dealing with anger include the following: 

·        Seeking refuge with Allaah from the accursed Shaytaan.

·        Keeping quiet.

·        Calming down; if you are standing, you should sit down; if you are sitting, you should lie down.

·        Remembering the reward for restraining anger, as it says in the saheeh hadeeth (authentic prophetic narration): “Do not get angry and Paradise will be yours.”

·        Understanding the high status of one who controls himself, as it says in the saheeh hadeeth: “Whoever restrains his anger, Allaah will cover his faults. Whoever controls his fury – even if he is able to show it – Allaah will fill his heart with hope on the Day of Resurrection.” (Classed as hasan/sound by al-Albaani in al-Silsilah al-Saheehah, 906).

·        Learning what the Prophet’s (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) teachings are concerning anger.

·        Knowing that controlling anger is one of the signs of piety, as it says in the hadeeth quoted above.

·        Paying attention when reminded, controlling oneself and following advice.

·        Knowing the bad effects of anger.

·        Thinking about how one is affected at the moment of anger.

·        Praying that Allaah will remove this resentment from one's heart. 

There follows a lovely story which will help you to deal with the child whose problem you mention: 

There was a boy who was always losing his temper. His father gave him a bag full of nails and said to him, “My son, I want you to hammer a nail into our garden fence every time you need to direct your anger against something and you lose your temper.” 

So the son started to follow his father’s advice. On the first day he hammered in 37 nails, but getting the nails into the fence was not easy, so he started trying to control himself when he got angry. As the days went by, he was hammering in less nails, and within weeks he was able to control himself and was able to refrain from getting angry and from hammering nails. He came to his father and told him what he had achieved. His father was happy with his efforts and said to him: “But now, my son, you have to take out a nail for every day that you do not get angry.” 

The son started to take out the nails for each day that he did not get angry, until there were no nails left in the fence. 

He came to his father and told him what he had achieved. His father took him to the fence and said, “My son, you have done well, but look at these holes in the fence. This fence will never be the same again.” Then he added: “When you say things in a state of anger, they leave marks like these holes on the hearts of others. You can stab a person and withdraw the knife but it doesn’t matter how many times you say ‘I’m sorry,’ because the wound will remain.

Fear of Future

Praise be to Allaah.  

My dear brother, how often we fail to look at things with a balanced view. How often we find problems in our daily lives that stem from the extremes of either concern or negligence. The one who seeks happiness and success in this world has to have a balanced approach without letting the one outweigh the other. In this manner he can strengthen his heart with faith and find peace of mind in doing that which he is required to do. What you are complaining of does not stem from ignorance of the root of the matter, rather it stems from the fact that you are focusing more on fear and the causes of fear and you are forgetting about being optimistic and not paying any attention to it. 

You know that death is an inevitable reality that will come to every living thing, and no one will be spared that, no matter how noble his status before Allaah. Allaah said to His Prophet, the noblest of all creation (interpretation of the meaning): 

“Verily, you (O Muhammad) will die, and verily, they (too) will die”

[al-Zumar 39:30] 

And Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): 

“Everyone shall taste death. And only on the Day of Resurrection shall you be paid your wages in full. And whoever is removed away from the Fire and admitted to Paradise, he indeed is successful. The life of this world is only the enjoyment of deception (a deceiving thing)”

[Aal ‘Imraan 3:185] 

And the poet said: 

Every son of a female, no matter how long he lives,

Will one day be carried on the bier. 

The positive kind of fear of death is that which make a person check himself and watch himself, and bring himself to task for bad deeds. This fear is that which makes a man keep away from sin and persist in praying for forgiveness and repenting. As for the kind of fear that makes a person panic, expect the worst and feel helpless, and discourages him from taking any action and prevents him from doing his duties, this is a negative and blameworthy kind of fear. The one who feels this has to strive hard to rid himself of it and put a stop to it. Perhaps this is what the questioner is feeling, and he thinks that this waswasah (whisper from the Shaytaan) is a warning of danger and a sign that the end is near. But this is not the case. All it is, is a whisper from the accursed Shaytaan, to cause distress to the believer and to make his life a misery, and there is nothing real behind it. This is why, when you went to the hospital for tests, they showed that you are in good health, which should make you feel better and give you peace of mind. Perhaps we can help you by telling you how to get rid of this waswasah (whisper from the Shaytaan), in the following ways: 

1 – Firmly implanting in your heart the belief that whatever Allaah wills happens, and whatever He does not will does not happen. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): 

“And you cannot will unless (it be) that Allaah wills the Lord of the ‘Aalameen (mankind, jinn and all that exists)”

[al-Takweer 81:29] 

Death is nothing but the decree of Allaah which the son of Adam has no way of warding off or avoiding. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): 

“Say (O Muhammad ): ‘I have no power over any harm or profit to myself except what Allaah may will. For every Ummah, there is a term appointed; when their term comes, neither can they delay it nor can they advance it an hour (or a moment)’”

[Yoonus 10:49] 

“Wheresoever you may be, death will overtake you even if you are in fortresses built up strong and high”

[al-Nisa’ 4:78] 

As this is the case, then fear of death will not delay it or bring it forward, all you will get from your fear of death is misery and worries. Your appointed time will never come until Allaah wills it, at the time that is known to Him, and you can never bring it forward, whether you fear death or not, whether you think about how your end will be or not. This is contrary to the life of peace, stability and tranquility that Allaah wants for the believers. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): 

“Whoever works righteousness — whether male or female — while he (or she) is a true believer (of Islamic Monotheism) verily, to him We will give a good life (in this world with respect, contentment and lawful provision), and We shall pay them certainly a reward in proportion to the best of what they used to do (i.e. Paradise in the Hereafter)”

[al-Nahl 16:97] 

2 – Remembering the kindness and mercy of Allaah towards His believing slaves, for He is Loving, Compassionate and Forgiving, the One Whose mercy prevails over His wrath, Who blesses the sinner with abundant forgiveness. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): 

“Why should Allaah punish you if you have thanked (Him) and have believed in Him. And Allaah is Ever All‑Appreciative (of good), All‑Knowing”

[al-Nisa’ 4:147] 

The believer is promised Paradise when he dies. There is nothing standing between him and Paradise but death. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “There is no person who bears witness that there is no god but Allaah and that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger, but Allaah will forbid him to the Fire.” (Narrated by Muslim, 47). 

3 – Always putting your trust in Allaah in all your affairs, and knowing that this trust (tawakkul) will ward off the whispers of the Shaytaan and put an end to them. Once you have resolved to do that, then do not look back. If you feel that these whispers are overwhelming you again, then turn to Allaah and seek refuge in Him. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): 

“And if an evil whisper comes to you from Shaytaan (Satan), then seek refuge with Allaah. Verily, He is All-Hearer, All-Knower”

[al-A’raaf 7:200] 

4 – Lift your head high and look forward; start your daily life with steadfastness and certainty, and approach all your actions with energy and peace of mind. How many good things there are in this world that fill hearts with contentment and tranquility and fill the heart with hope and certain faith. 

With regard to your question, what is going to happen to you and your family in the future, 

Subhaan-Allaah (glory be to Allaah)! 

Are you the one who created them? Are you the one who grants them provision? Are you the one who is taking care of their needs? 

No, it is Allaah Who does all that, Who is more merciful towards them than you are. Have complete trust that Allaah will never cause them to be lost, may He be glorified and praised. This matter is not up to you at all. If all the people thought in this way no one would have any peace of mind. But praise be to Allaah Who has guaranteed provision for everyone. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): 

“And no moving (living) creature is there on earth but its provision is due from Allaah. And He knows its dwelling place and its deposit (in the uterus or grave). All is in a Clear Book (Al‑Lawh Al‑Mahfooz — the Book of Decrees with Allaah)”

[Hood 11:6] 

So cast these thoughts away from your mind. 

5 – You should make a lot of du’aa’ asking Allaah to dispel this waswaas (whispers from the Shaytaan) from you. Pray to Him with all humbleness, expressing your weakness and need of Him. And rest assured that He will certainly answer you. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): 

“And when My slaves ask you (O Muhammad) concerning Me, then (answer them), I am indeed near (to them by My Knowledge). I respond to the invocations of the supplicant when he calls on Me (without any mediator or intercessor). So let them obey Me and believe in Me, so that they may be led aright”

[al-Baqarah 2:186] 

With regard to those who die as a result of accidents, the fact that they die in this manner does not mean that they are bad at all. Rather people who are counted among the righteous may die in this manner. Think about this hadeeth which will help you to resolve this matter. The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “The martyrs are five: those who are stabbed, those who die of a stomach disease, those who drown, those who are crushed by falling walls, and those who die in battle for the sake of Allaah.” (Narrated by al-Bukhaari, no. 615). 

Look at those who die by drowning, or by fire, or who are crushed by falling walls. Are these not frightening things? But that does not indicate that they are bad, rather the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) called them martyrs (shuhada’), which is the utmost honour. The way in which a person dies does not indicate that he is bad, but Allaah in His wisdom decrees that some people should die in this manner. Perhaps that is in order to raise them in status in Paradise, or to expiate for some of their sins, or for some other reason that we do not know. 

We ask Allaah to guide you to good deeds and positive thinking.

How to protect from whispers and waswaas of Shaytaan?

Praise be to Allaah.  

One of the means that the Shaytaan uses to misguide people is by casting doubts and whispers (waswaas) into their hearts. The Messenger of Allaah peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) has warned us against some of these things. It says in the hadeeth: “The Shaytaan comes to any one of you and says, ‘Who created such and such? Who created such and such?’ until he says, ‘Who created your Lord?’ If that happens to you, seek refuge with Allaah and give up these thoughts.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari, no. 3277 

The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) taught us two important things: 

1 – To turn to Allaah and seek His protection, and to beseech Him, for He is the most Generous: 

“And if an evil whisper comes to you from Shaytaan (Satan), then seek refuge with Allaah”

[al-A’raaf 7:200 – interpretation of the meaning] 

2 – To put a stop to this matter and turn away from it, and to keep ourselves busy with other, useful things. 

The companions of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) came to him complaining about the doubts and waswaas that they were suffering. In Saheeh Muslim it is narrated that Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: “Some of the companions of the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) came to him and said, ‘We find in our hearts things that none of us dares utter.’ He said, ‘Do you really find that?’ They said, ‘Yes.’ He said, ‘That is clear faith.’” (2/153). 

What is meant by his saying ‘That is clear faith’ is that their hatred of that waswasah and their rejecting it was a clear sign of faith. 

The Shaytaan only whispers to people of faith; as for the kaafir (non-Muslim), he comes to him, however, he wants and does not limit himself to waswaas, rather he toys with him however he wishes. 

The belief concerning which there can be no doubt is that the entire universe, from its heights to its depths, is in a state of submission to Allaah and no one in the universe possesses any power. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): 

“Say: (O Muhammad to polytheists, pagans) Call upon those whom you assert (to be associate gods) besides Allaah, they possess not even an atom’s (or a small ant’s) weight either in the heavens or on the earth, nor have they any share in either, nor there is for Him any supporter from among them.

Intercession with Him profits not except for him whom He permits”

[Saba’ 34:22-23] 

This crafty enemy is keen to misguide people and to make them doubt. The more you seek the help of Allaah, learn about your enemy and be prepared to face him, the more you will be victorious over him. If you know your true enemy, the following are the weapons at your disposal. 

Firstly: 

Adherence to the Qur’aan and Sunnah in word and deed, and keeping away from the paths of misguidance, for on every path there is a devil calling people to it. So you should follow the beliefs, words, acts of worship and laws that have come from Allaah and abstain from that which He has forbidden. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): 

“Enter perfectly in Islam (by obeying all the rules and regulations of the Islamic religion)”

[al-Baqarah 2:208] 

Silm (translated here as Islam) refers to Islam. Muqaatil interpreted it as doing all kinds of good and righteous deeds. 

Whoever gives up any part of Islam has followed in some of the footsteps of the Shaytaan. 

Adhering to the Qur’aan and Sunnah in word and deed expels the Shaytaan and annoys him greatly. Muslim narrated from Abu Hurayrah: “When the son of Adam recites a verse of sajdah (prostration) and prostrates, the Shaytaan withdraws weeping, saying, ‘Woe to me, the son of Adam was commanded to prostrate, and he prostrated, so Paradise will be his; I was commanded to prostrate and I disobeyed, so Hell will be mine.’” Narrated by Muslim, no. 133. 

Secondly: 

Seeking refuge with Allaah from all kinds of evil and turning to Him. Islam teaches us to seek refuge with Allaah in certain situations, such as the following: 

When entering the washroom: “Allaahumma inni a’oodhu bika min al-khubthi wa’l-khabaa’ith (O Allaah, I seek refuge with You from the male and female devils).” 

When one is angry: “A’oodhu Billaahi min al-Shaytaan ir-rajeem (I seek refuge with Allaah from the accursed Shaytaan).” 

When having intercourse: “Bismillaah Allaahumma jannibna al-shaytaan wa jannib al-shaytaana ma razaqtana (In the name of Allaah, O Allaah, keep the Shaytaan away from us and keep the Shaytaan away from that which You may bless us with).” 

When stopping in a place: “A’oodhu bi kalimaat-Allaah il-taammah min sharri ma khalaqa (I seek refuge in the perfect words of Allaah from the evil of that which He has created).” 

When hearing the braying of a donkey: “A’oodhu Billaahi min al-Shaytaan ir-rajeem (I seek refuge with Allaah from the accursed Shaytaan).” 

When starting to read Qur’aan: “A’oodhu Billaah il-samee’ il-‘aleem min al-Shaytaan ir-rajeem (I seek refuge with Allaah, the All-Hearing, All-Knowing, from the accursed Shaytaan).” 

After starting to pray: “A’oodhu Billaah il-samee’ il-‘aleem min al-Shaytaan ir-rajeem wa min hamzihi wa nafakhihi wa nafthihi (I seek refuge with Allaah, the All-Hearing, All-Knowing, from the accursed Shaytaan, from his madness, his arrogance and his poetry).” 

The best words with which we may seek refuge with Allaah are al-Mi’wadhatayn i.e., Soorat al-Falaq and Soorat al-Naas. It was narrated from ‘Uqbah ibn ‘Aamir (may Allaah be pleased with him) that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Do you not see the verses that were revealed to me tonight, the like of which have never been seen? Qul ‘aoodhu bi Rabb il-falaq and Qul ‘aoodhi bi rabb il-naas.” Narrated by Muslim, 814. 

Thirdly: 

Keeping busy with dhikr (the remembrance of Allah), for this is the greatest thing that may protect a person. In the hadeeth (narration) it says that Allaah commanded Yahya (peace be upon him) to enjoin five things upon the Children of Israel, one of which was: “I command you to remember Allaah, for this is like a man who is being pursued by the enemy, then he comes to a strong fortress and saves himself from them. Similarly a man cannot save himself from his enemy except by means of dhikr.” Narrated by al-Haafiz Abu Moosa al-Madani in al-Targheeb fi’l-Khisaal al-Hameedah wa’l-Tarheeb min al-Khilaal al-Murdiyyah. Ibn al-Qayyim said: Shaykh al-Islam used to regard this hadeeth highly, and I heard that he used to say: “The evidence for its being sound is quite clear.” al-Waabil al-Sayyib, 60. 

Fourthly: 

Adhering to the main body of the Muslims (the jamaa’ah) by living in a Muslim land and choosing righteous friends who will help him to do good. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Whoever among you wants to attain the best part of Paradise, let him adhere to the main body of the Muslims, for the Shaytaan is with the one who is alone but he is farther away from two.” Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, 2254. Al-Qaari’ said: its isnaad (chain of narrators) is saheeh (authentic). Al-Mubaarakfoori said: The entire hadeeth is either saheeh or hasan (sound). Tuhfat al-Ahwadhi, 6/320. 

Fifthly: 

Opposing the Shaytaan, for he may come in the form of someone offering sincere advice, so we must go against him. For if he were really good he would be good to himself first, but he has caused himself to be doomed to Hell. So if he comes to you whilst you are praying, and says, “You are showing off (so cut your prayer short),” then make your prayer lengthy. If he says, “You have broken your wudoo’,” say, “You are lying”. If he says to you that the dead can hear you and benefit you or harm you, tell him, “You are lying.” When you eat, be different from him and eat and drink with your right hand, and take food with your right hand. This even applies to taking a siesta, as it says in the hadeeth: “Take a siesta for the devils do not take a siesta.” Narrated by Abu Na’eem with a saheeh isnaad. Saheeh al-Jaami’, 4/147. 

Even with regard to a piece of food that falls to the ground, the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Pick it up and do not leave it for the Shaytaan…” Narrated by Muslim, 12, al-Adaab. 

Sixthly: 

Repenting and seeking Allaah’s forgiveness. According to the hadeeth the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “The Shaytaan said to the Lord of Glory: ‘By Your Glory O Lord, I will keep trying to misguide Your slaves so long as their souls are in their bodies.’ The Lord said, ‘By My Glory and Majesty, I will continue to forgive them so long as they ask My forgiveness.’” Narrated by Ahmad in al-Musnad and classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Jaami’, 2/32 

So man should always be in a state of repentance and turning to Allaah. They have an example in their father Adam (peace be upon him): 

“Our Lord! We have wronged ourselves. If You forgive us not, and bestow not upon us Your Mercy, we shall certainly be of the losers”

[al-A’raaf 7:23 – interpretation of the meaning] 

These are some of the means that will help you to ward off this waswaas. We ask Allaah the Almighty, by His most beautiful names and sublime attributes to grant us refuge from the madness of the devils and from their traps and whispers. Praise be to Allaah the Lord of the Worlds.

Best method and way to treat Anxiety

Praise be to Allaah.  

There is nothing wrong with treating the diseases that befall a person, and this is not forbidden. But that is subject to the condition that the treatment does not cause side effects which are worse than the problem itself. 

We advise the one who is sick – whether that is spiritual (mental) illness such as anxiety and depression, or physical illness such as various kinds of pain – to hasten first of all to treat the problem with ruqyah as prescribed in sharee’ah. This means verses and ahaadeeth which are recommended in sharee’ah and in which the texts state there is healing for diseases. 

Then we advise treating it with natural materials which Allaah has created, such as honey and plants, for Allaah has created special properties in them which may treat many kinds of diseases, and at the same time they do not have any side effects on the one who takes them. 

We think that you should not take artificial chemical remedies for anxiety. For this disease a person needs a spiritual remedy rather than a chemical one. 

So he needs to increase his faith and his trust in his Lord; he needs to make more du’aa’ and pray more. If he does that, his anxiety will be removed. Seeking to relax by means of doing acts of worship has a great effect on the soul, dispelling many kinds of psychological disease. Hence we do not see any benefit in going to a psychologist whose beliefs are corrupt, let alone one who is a kaafir. The more the doctor knows about Allaah and His religion, the better advice he will give to his patient.  

Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): 

“Whoever works righteousness — whether male or female — while he (or she) is a true believer (of Islamic Monotheism) verily, to him We will give a good life (in this world with respect, contentment and lawful provision), and We shall pay them certainly a reward in proportion to the best of what they used to do (i.e. Paradise in the Hereafter)”

[al-Nahl 16:97] 

It was narrated that Suhayb said: the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “How wonderful is the affair of the believer, for all his affairs are good, and this applies to no one except the believer. If something good happens to him, he gives thanks, and that is good for him, and it something bad happens to him, he bears it with patience, and that is good for him.”

(Narrated by Muslim, 2999) 

This world should not be the main concern of the Muslim. Worry about his provision should not find any room in his heart or mind, lest that make his sickness and his anxiety worse. 

It was narrated that Anas (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Whoever is mainly concerned about the Hereafter, Allaah will make him feel independent of others and will make him focused and content, and his worldly affairs will fall into place. But whoever is mainly concerned with this world, Allaah will make him feel in constant need of others and will make him distracted and unfocused, and he will get nothing of this world except what is decreed for him.”

(Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, 2389; classed as saheeh by Shaykh al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Jaami’, 6510). 

Ibn al-Qayyim (may Allaah have mercy on him) said: “When a person spends his entire day with no other concern but Allaah alone, Allaah, may He be glorified, will take care of all his needs and take care of all that is worrying him; He will empty his heart so that it will be filled only with love for Him, free his tongue so that it will speak only in remembrance of Him (dhikr) and cause all his faculties to work only in obedience to Him. But if a person spends his entire day with no other concern but this world, Allaah will make him bear its distress, anxiety and pain; He will leave him to sort himself out, and cause his heart to be distracted from the love of Allaah towards the love of some created being, cause his tongue to speak only in remembering people instead of remembering Allaah, and cause him to use his talents and energy in obeying and serving them. So he will strive hard, labouring like some work-animal, to serve something other than Allaah… Everyone who turns away from being a true slave of Allaah and obeying Him and loving Him will be burdened with servitude, love and obedience to some created being. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): ‘And whosoever turns away (blinds himself) from the remembrance of the Most Beneficent (Allaah), We appoint for him a shaytaan (devil) to be a qareen (intimate companion) to him.’ [al-Zukhruf 43:36].”

Al-Fawaa’id, p. 159

Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen (may Allaah have mercy on him) was asked:

Can a believer become mentally ill? What is the treatment for that according to sharee’ah? Please note that modern medicine treats these illnesses with modern medicines only.

He replied:

Undoubtedly a person may suffer from psychological or mental diseases, such as anxiety about the future and regret for the past. Psychological diseases affect the body more than physical diseases affect it. Treating these diseases by means of the things prescribed in sharee’ah – i.e., ruqyah – is more effective than treating them with physical medicines, as is well known.

One of the means of treating them is mentioned in the saheeh hadeeth from Ibn Mas’ood (may Allaah be pleased with him): “There is no-one who is afflicted by distress and grief, and says: ‘Allaahumma inni ‘abduka ibn ‘abdika ibn amatika naasyati bi yadika, maada fiyya hukmuka, ‘adlun fiyya qadaa’uka. As’aluka bi kulli ismin huwa laka sammayta bihi nafsaka aw anzaltahu fi kitaabika aw ‘allamtahu ahadan min khalqika aw ista’tharta bihi fi ‘ilm il-ghayb ‘indaka an taj’al al-Qur’aana rabee’ qalbi wa noor sadri wa jalaa’ huzni wa dhihaab hammi (O Allaah, I am Your slave, son of Your slave, son of Your maidservant; my forelock is in Your hand, Your command over me is forever executed and Your decree over me is just. I ask You by every name belonging to You which You have named Yourself with, or revealed in Your Book, or You taught to any of Your creation, or You have preserved in the knowledge of the Unseen with You, that You make the Qur’aan the life of my heart and the light of my breast, and a departure for my sorrow and a release for my anxiety),’ but Allaah will take away his distress and grief, and replace it with joy.” This is one of the remedies prescribed in sharee’ah.

One can also say “Laa ilaaha illa Anta, subhaanaka inni kuntu min al-zaalimeen (none has the right to be worshipped but You (O Allaah), Glorified (and Exalted) be You [above all that (evil) they associate with You]! Truly, I have been of the wrongdoers)” [al-Anbiya 21:87 – interpretation of the meaning]. 

Whoever wants to know more than that should refer to what the scholars have written about dhikr, such as al-Waabil al-Sayyib by Ibn al-Qayyim; al-Kalim al-Tayyib by Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Tayimiyah; al-Adhkaar by al-Nawawi; Zaad al-Ma’aad by Ibn al-Qayyim. 

But because people’s faith is weak nowadays, they are less receptive to the remedies prescribed in sharee’ah. So people nowadays have started to rely on physical medicines more than on the remedies prescribed in sharee’ah. But when a person’s faith is strong, the remedies prescribed in sharee’ah are completely effective, and may work faster than physical medicine. We all know about the story of the man whom the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) sent on a campaign and he camped near some Arab people, but those people near whom he camped showed him no hospitality at all. Allaah willed that their leader should be stung by a scorpion, and they said to one another, “Go to those people who have camped nearby, perhaps you will find a raaqi (one who can recite ruqyah) with them.” The Sahaabah said to them, “We will not recite ruqyah for your leader unless you give us such and such a number of sheep.” They said, “Fine.” So one of the Sahaabah went and recited ruqyah for the one who had been stung. He recited Soorat al-Faatihah only, and the one who had been stung got up as if released from a chain. 

Reciting al-Faatihah had such an effect on this man because it came from a heart that was filled with faith. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) asked him, “How did you come to know that it (Soorat al-Faatihah) could be recited as a ruqyah?” 

But in these times when religious commitment and faith have become weak, people have started to rely on external physical medicines, and they are suffering as a result. 

But on the other hand there are charlatans who play with people’s minds; they are clever and able to trick people, claiming that they are good reciters of ruqyah when in fact they are consuming people’s wealth unlawfully. So people are caught between two extremes; one extreme is those who think that ruqyah has no effect at all, and the other is those tricksters who play with people’s minds by reciting false and deceitful readings. And there are some who are moderate in their approach to this issue.

 Fataawa Islamiyyah, 4/465, 466

 We ask Allaah to protect us and you from the evils of anxiety and worry, and to open our hearts to faith, guidance and tranquility.